Schmoo, since you are classy and work for a real business you probably use Outlook.

Since I work in a place where we have to buy our own computers and chairs, I use Google Calendar. I have always hated it since I use a paper planner as well and inevitably I'll write down something on one and omit it on the other.

That has all changed recently. Why? Because Google Calendar now allows me to add pieces of flair to events. If I'm going to a happy hour, I can put a little martini glass by the event name. If I'm teaching, I can put a little book next to the event name. Most importantly, on the day you're coming to visit I can put a big smiley face and on the day you're leaving I can put a big frowny face.

It's amazing.
I had an interesting conversation with a friend today. It was in reference to the types of adjectives men use to describe women. Let's face it, words like "cute", "pretty", and "hot" are a little lackluster. They're the equivalent of being referred to as "baby" by a stranger. You're not the kind of person who has a problem with that? Then get out of here.

This conversation began at a sandwich shop as this song blasted over the speakers:
Leaving the commentary on this hilarious trainwreck of a masterpiece to you, schmoo.

At any rate, this is a call to action. One- or two-syllable adjectives just don't cut it. Using the word "sexy" to describe a "booty" is a nice way to get a punch in the teeth. Three-syllable adjectives, however, harken back to a time before we even had words like "booty". Did you know that "bromance" is officially in the OED now?? Outrageous.

I'd like to think that there are people out there who still use three-syllable adjectives. Let's think of some now.


What are some others? Please, for the love of god, don't say "hump-worthy". That's a hyphenate. It doesn't count.