I had an interesting conversation with a friend today. It was in reference to the types of adjectives men use to describe women. Let's face it, words like "cute", "pretty", and "hot" are a little lackluster. They're the equivalent of being referred to as "baby" by a stranger. You're not the kind of person who has a problem with that? Then get out of here.

This conversation began at a sandwich shop as this song blasted over the speakers:
Leaving the commentary on this hilarious trainwreck of a masterpiece to you, schmoo.

At any rate, this is a call to action. One- or two-syllable adjectives just don't cut it. Using the word "sexy" to describe a "booty" is a nice way to get a punch in the teeth. Three-syllable adjectives, however, harken back to a time before we even had words like "booty". Did you know that "bromance" is officially in the OED now?? Outrageous.

I'd like to think that there are people out there who still use three-syllable adjectives. Let's think of some now.


What are some others? Please, for the love of god, don't say "hump-worthy". That's a hyphenate. It doesn't count.
I showed your cat video to a coworker and said, "This is how my sister feels today." She said, "That's so funny because I have a cat image that expresses how I feel." Then I said, "Oh god, so do I."

We shared the images/videos. We laughed. We commiserated. Then we promptly went back to our desks keenly aware that we had just shared THREE different anecdotes involving cats. We don't even LIKE cats. And how many cat stories do you have to tell before you're a crazy cat lady? Oh, the horror.

But let's not think about that. I have included our videos/pictures for your viewing pleasure. And I feel compelled to say that we will be on our way to happy hour, promptly.
This is my coworker's life metaphor.

This is mine.
Oh man, this day is full of emotion.